New Moon in Libra Spread

One thing that SO often prevents me from making regular posts is the effort I put in. It's rooted in this whole "fear of getting it wrong" bullshit that is one of the most self-sabotaging things I do (in a list of many I tell ya lol). Also the fact that I type like a 4 year old lol. So in order to bring more ease as opposed to effort, I will attempt to make shorter posts more often. Let's see how it works out.

Today i am doing a spread that Lisa posted called the Libra Harmony New Moon Spread. Libra is one sign I really don't know much about and have known very few people born under it. So i figured this would help me to understand Libra peeps, the Justice card, and prepare for the new moon on October 12. Hey, it's totally a shout out to Duran Duran. It'll be a New Moon on Monday lol! Every single time I can possibly make that reference I do! I'm using by beloved Tarot of Vampyres. (Has anyone bought this deck recently?? I just purchase a new copy and I can't even begin to tell you how angry I am at the absolutely shitty card stock they are now printed on! Like, I may even actually contact Llewellyn because they should be ashamed!)

As I asses an overall tone of the four cards, I notice that two are associated with cardinal signs and one with mutable. I will have to be mindful of my natural tendency to get all excited and fired up but have shitty follow-through on projects because I get bored or my focus gets scattered. This many earth cards also lets me know that my Capricorn ass is going to have to be more flexible/less stubborn. Wow. Spot. On. This is one reason I adore this deck. The accuracy and depth of the readings it gives me is almost like that of a sentient being, an old friend who knows me well.

1. Sow - Something lacking in my life that I need to bring in for more balance- 4 of Skulls - Order, structure, determination. This is the Sun in Capricorn- power and growth that leads to the growth of tangible results. I love the female vamp's very confident, unaffected posture! Her backs against the wall but she is not pressed in the least bit! And her lovers more assertive, forceful appearance. She wears the Capricorn glyph on her arm, he the Sun's on his very impressive weapon dripping with fresh blood. This pair is an unstoppable force. i wonder if this is someone who will assist me (my cousin Michele quite possibly) or is it two aspects of me?
2. Weed - What is there too much of that's causing imbalance? 2 of Knives - Indecision, stagnation due to feeling so out of balance and overwhelmed by the shit storm I'm in. This is the Moon in Libra. There is too much stress that is preventing me from trusting my intuition. Every problem must have a solution just based on the law of physics. I can remove a lot of the mental sparing in my head by 1. Looking at the things that are stressful with eyes wide open and 2. Shutting off the thoughts in my head by meditation and breathing exercises.
3. Nurture - What I need to use to help card #1 take root - Ace of Scepters - Willpower. Re-newed, raw courage. I don't like to use the word goals. For some reason it makes me think of every single reason why something won't work the want I want it to. So I've replaced it in my vocabulary with desire. That feels much more intriguing, enticing. Possible. It puts my energy in the flow of what it feels like to have that desire as a current reality, not a far off wish blocked by obstacles. I also see this giant cross as a symbol of faith and protection. Of the fires signs in the zodiac: Aries, Leo, and Sag/fired up, determined, optimistic. This card in this position also says to me how important it is for me to do things that are completely NOT related to the tasks that I have to accomplish that are so overwhelming. Because that's how I can prevent from getting burned out. So I must go out, play pool, go to the movies, and enjoy every second of my limited time back in New Orleans!
4. Harvest - What I can expect by the Full Moon - The Hermit IX - mutable sign of Virgo, the number 9 which is completion yet still transition. This card for me is the goddess Hecate as well as the Lwa Papa Legba, both cross-roads spirits. WOW! As I am typing this I just got an email notification pop up on my phone with Hecate in the subject line!! I connected with her around this time last year in the UK. I'll have to do a meditation and candle work hear what she wants me to know, which path she wants me to take at this time. The Hermit for me is also about enlightenment. The need to withdrawn in order to have things crystallize, to hear mySelf as it directs me. I will be better able to set aside alone time dedicated to studying my cards and my course work in my Angelic Tarot class. It also warns me to not over-analyze shit and get stuck (Earth/Virgo). So by the full moon, I should have a lot more self-confidence and wisdom about the choices, the crossroads I am at. I will most likely also need a lot of alone time. Perhaps some shadow work on the other side of the full moon with the help of Hecate.
I also love the fact that the Hermit displays a direct quote from Duran Duran, "I light my torch and wave it for the new moon on Monday!"

Meet Me Halfway - Day 57

I was called to use The Nefertari's Tarot deck and I've drawn the 2 of swords. There are two women and two swords that mirror each other. Above them is a banner with red little flags or spears, they are the potential for a nasty, heated argument. But I notice they are are contained. The women wear snow white dresses (purity, clarity, the color worn in many spiritual ceremonies) with ornate gold and onyx collars across their shoulders and necks which suggestes they have learned to harness their ego and false pride by remaining grounded because they are secure within themselves.

Hence why the daggers are below and in front. They've made their respective points quite clear but have chosen to meet each other half way. They have laid aside their need to be right and now can see things eye to eye. Their hands are in prayer position as if saying "Namaste- I honor the precense of God in you". Ones' fingertips meet the others, showing an agreement to work together. No more arguing or using harsh words to make themselves heard. The 2ofSw corresponds to the Moon in Libra, so compromise is found by weighing the benefits of being analytical and detached against compassion and care for another's feelings (Moon). Or another way to say that is the question do you want to be right or happy? If you can find a way to have a meeting of the minds, you just might get both.

This calls to mind a reading I did today for a client who's boyfriend sat in as per her request. He is a Libra. Some things came up in the reading that caused me to be led to explain this way of approaching things. I wonder if I will have to take my own advise tomorrow. But I did just speak with my mom had had the nicest, most even conversation. Proof positive that taking the advice this card just gave me is a very wise choice.

 

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Coffee, Computers, and Rx Joie-de-Vivre

I cannot believe I am up! WTH. I have a sneaking suspicion I know the root of insomnia returning to torture me. I just came back from the potty (TMI huh... sorry..lol) and saw my Joie-de-Vivre deck. Its gentility and kind nature drew me to get clarity on the matter. (btw, the artist Paulina Cassidy is doing a fantastic deluxe version both the J-de-V and her Paulina Tarot) As I started to shuffle, I felt like I needed to ask it about reading reversals with it from now on. Let's see what she has to say:

How do you fee about me reading you with Rx? - Queen of Pentacles - As I was shuffling this card flipped over and slid itself back into the deck. The Queen of Coins as she is called in the Joie-de-Vivre is my card as a Capricorn woman. She sits near a canal on a toadstool  underneath the bough of a tree that is draped in Spanish moss. This is pretty much the landscape I see when I look out of the window of my room here in New Orleans, just beyond the backyard. I notice her 4 hands, 3 of which hold a large disk with a series of hearts and the triple Goddess lunar symbol in the center, the 4th hand consoling a rather ticked off looking rabbit.  This brings to mind one of my oldest, dearest friends since 8th grade, Laura. Our nick-name for each other is "Rabbit" or simply "R", and she too is a Capricorn. We have talked many times about our Capricorn resistance to change and tried to gently encourage each other (God and Goddess forbid one dare tell a Capricorn what they "have" to do! From stubborn to obtuse in the blink of an eye lol!) to be more accepting of it, dare I say even embrace it. I'm thinking you do want me to read you with Rx.

                                             
Clarification - Ace of Pentacles Rx - (shown upright so you can actually see what it looks like) Lol, I have to laugh. Somehow in my insomniac confusion, I inadvertently held the deck the wrong way, and in so doing, the card came up Rx. Aces are potential to be tapped into and cultivated, the seeds of possibility. Thus AofP Rx is warning me of missing this opportunity to grow as a reader. I can't be the timid little mouse at this pixie's feet. And these days I am in a phase of all kinds of bold new beginnings, so I need to continue along that line of thought and behavior. So while I feel some decks do not wish to be read Rx, this one  in particular when I first received it, is telling me it is ready now.

So after a good bit of effort put into ensure the cards were well mixed between upright and inverted, on to the initially intended reading...
Both cards are upright LOL. And the Queen of Coins fell out again!
Both cards are also Swords..... rats... *sigh and upturned lip* Capricorns have such issues with change. Why must it be so painful and feel like it is cutting away at who we are? I need a new mentality about the subject. Stagnation is death.


How does too much coffee affect me?  - 2of Swords-  LOL omg, look at that giant eyeball! Wide awake! And yes I am right now at 07:17 and have been since 04:30! And then there is that large being with an even more enormous eyeball. The bats make me think of flitting about with excessive or nervous energy. The crossed swords saying it causes me to be even more scatter-brained and indecisive, at cross-purposes with myself. I may even be a bit defensive?? I notice how the woman is bent  over, as if her lower back is in pain and her shoulders hunched up that lead to neck and shoulder pain. All of that anxiety leads to tension and thus increases the pain from the damaged disks along my spine. She seems to be immobile, going nowhere fast. It is when I am not exercising regularly that I have issues with my beloved elixir. --- (she says as she notices the sunlight streaming through her window has replaced the darkness of night... *upturned lip*) So I have to make better choices. Which sux. Because I.  LOVE.  COFFEE! I'm Creole for God's sake!

How does spending a lot of time online affect me? -  Ace of Swords - Look at this one, flitting about, one eye looking at me, one through his telescope to see what other people are doing. LOL, and now I see the sun at the bottom of the card starting to rise! I have the potential to be far more productive than I ever am online. But I mostly just flit about like Skippy over here lol. Television and computers are what is known as a hot medium and requires far more brain activity than a cool medium, such as reading, or listening to music without vocals. I need to read a dang book and no more Crackbook.. I mean Facebook before bed! lol

So on that note, I shall take a few deep cleansing breaths and try to get a few more hours as opposed to taking pictures to finish this post. Do any of you find you have the same issues with coffee or being online?

*this gorgeous video is the creation of the person who uploaded it to YT. The song is "Xpectation", a jazz project that Prince did years ago that is unfortuantely not very well known. The music is so beautiful and soothing. I was listening to another song from the album called "Xhalation" but could not find a video for it. However, I think this one it perfect for this post. I do hope you enjoy*

Reading For the Year 2012

I am doing a spread that my friend Lisa of Tarotize created. It is called the 6 Card New Year's Eve spread. Well I have been battling bronchitis since Christmas Eve, so I am just doing it now. The first thing needed is to figure out your personal tarot card for the year for 2012. Mine is The Lovers VI. She advises that you use that card from one deck and then do the reading with another. That way you can see if that same card comes up again in the reading. (How crazy would that be??) She also says you will get much more out of the reading if you know the planet, astrological sign, and element that correspond with your card. For The Lovers it is the planet Mercury, sign  Gemini, and the element of Air. She says that any cards that have those energies will be emphasized.

Place your Year Card just off to the right so that you can remember that you are viewing this reading through the eyes of that card. I have chosen to use The Lovers from my Tarot of Vampyres. It is absolutely gorgeous.
Lay the cards out to represent a pentagram, as if drawing a star. So bottom left is earth. At the top as if to be the point of the star is spirit. Horizontally across from the first card, (earth) and off to the right of the center card (spirit) is the 3rd card you lay, it represents fire. (think bottom point of the star you are drawing). Diagonally across and between card 1 and card 2 place the 4th card for air. Horizontally across from it place the 5th card for water. (Again, imagine you are drawing a star. If you need a visual, Lisa has one on her post you can see). The final card is placed dead center. She advises using an oracle card to show what your role is in the greater scheme of things. I will use my Shadows & Light Oracle.

1. Earth - Financial and physical outlook for 2012.
2. Spirit - You main spiritual lesson (She says you could also use an oracle card here as well. I will use both)
3. Fire - Shows your creativity, will power and ambition. Where to direct your passion.
4. Air - Problem solving in your head. What is your main communication and problem solving theme.
5. Water - Your main relationship theme and how to nurture your emotional Self.
6. Interface card - How you can best serve humanity.

The very first thing I notice is that all of the cards but are the same element as the elemental position. The earth position has an earth card, air is air, and water is of water. Interesting.

If I am to look at this reading through the eyes of The Lovers, then I am to look at things from the perspective of making choices that will lead me to what my heart truly longs for, what I know in my heart I am passionate about.

1. Earth - King of Pentacles - OMG are you serious!? Could you ask for a better card in this position? Material success and good health! Woo- freakin' hoo! This king looks very content and grounded. I think those are grapes up in the top corners of the card, but to me they look like wisteria, which grows prevalently in New Orleans and is one of the things I love most about springtime here. The money to be made from me reading cards in The Quarter will be pretty slim until springtime or at least late winter when Mardi Gras rolls around, but boy will it roll in then! I also notice an egg at the side of the BunnyRabbit king reminding me to put savings in a nest egg. Earth is the slower of the elements. I need to remember to be patient and persevere, not to give up because this wealth may be slow at first and this reading is the themes for the whole year. So do not get discouraged. (I tend to ya know)

2. Spirit - Nautilus Princess #41 and 2 of swords - My main spiritual lesson is one of powerful personal growth. This card is about entering a transition from Princess to Queen and thus having to make better choices aka time to grow the hell up! I see the nautilus shell as saying that I need to come out from my comfort one if I am to grow and the pearls in her hair showing that I have the wisdom necessary. The companion book says, "A time of spiritual and emotional transformation that could come via a new job, relationship, or life transition, like becoming a parent." ..... OH MY! "It is time to take your self and your potential seriously." The tarot card I pulled is the 2ofSw.This version of the card says I need to not cut of my nose to spite my face (a very Capricorn thing to do lol). Also, just because my earthly eyes cannot see all the answers, I have to learn to truly trust the vision of my third eye, my intuition. Again the theme of making choices based on what will make my heart content.

3. Fire - 8 of coins - Choose to follow my follow my passions, start by learning as much as I can about the things I am passionate about. It looks like she is a witch out in the bayou creating magick in her cauldron. This is telling me to get more involved with my calling to get back on my path as a witch. Also to learn as much as I can in the areas I love. I need to go to RS12 is a very strong feeling I get now. I sure hope that KofP

4. Air - Justice XI - The element of air in the air position. I reminds me of that 2ofSw in Spirit and the main theme of the Year Card, The Lovers; choice, decisions made from a place of integrity and balancing the head with the heart. My fate is not set in stone, I have free will. So I need to really weigh my options in order to make better decisions and thus get better results. And to be fine with the decisions I make and stop stressing!

5. Water - The Chariot VII - Again with this theme of choice. I need to be decisive and focus on what I want NOT what I do not want. Don't get overly emotional because that takes my focus from reaching my goals. Oh yeah, SET SPECIFIC GOALS so I am not just floating aimlessly and at cross purposes with myself.

6. How can I best serve humanity - Fairy of the Highlands #20 - I really do not like conflict and generally try to avoid it. But this card says that there will be some and I must be brave and fight like I mean it when I have to and do not back down. Take back my power and cut ties with those who do not have my best interest at heart.

This was a very cool reading and yielded a lot of good information. I think it would really serve me well to come aback to it periodically to do progress checks with myself.

Yule 2011 Spread

I decided to do a Yule reading and found an interesting spread on YouTube. I made a of of my own modifications since I do not have a Goddess oracle or my Universal Goddess Tarot with me. It is mean to reflect from now until Feb 2, which is Candlemas.



1. Elemental power that is accompanying me? - Rx Page of Coins- Earth is the element. Today marks the transition from autumn to winter, a time of the final harvest to the time of harsh endurance. Reading tarot out in the square is toughest now. The weather keeps people away. It will rain for the next several days here, which totally sux because I sure was hoping to make some very much needed cash. And I haven't heard back from the lady who wanted me to work a party of the 30th. So I am stressing money and times are very harsh right now. I hope that the girl's had on that pentacle means that money will be forth coming and being Rx means keep my head up because the element of earth is with me, so security may be hard to see but it is present. Or will be soon.


2. What is most important lesson form recent past?- 7 of swords- This says to me that I have been through some very stressful times, but I always land on my feet. Do not let anyone or anything steal my joy.

3. Central theme of Yule Night- Rx Queen of Wands- Tonight is about me facing my fears and focusing on how this night of rebirth is an opportunity to reignite my passion about my life, my tarot business for example. Especially as I am about to turn 40 in 4 days. I'm calling it "Phase II".

4. What do I leave behind now?- 2 of swords- I leave behind indecision. (God I hope so!) This card always makes me think of New Orleans and Mardi Gras. It is telling me to leave the fears I have about committing to moving back here to NOLA. My emotions are keeping me from getting a grip on how to best take action.

5. What will be born anew?-  Ace of Cups- Gotta love this! I think it is actually speaking to several things. I think it means as I am starting to love myself more and love this Phase II I am opening myself to being able to receive and give love. Until very recently it has been a real long time since romance was on my mind. I think a new romance is headed my way. I also think that healing and a new way for my mother and I to relate to one another will be "born". I sure hope so.

6. Which present do I receive now?-  The Star XVII- Oh wow!! What a magnificent card! Hope and lightness of my spirit. My angels are with me and will guide me. I just did an amazing mediation I learned from Rowan and I know I was interacting with so many loved ones on the other side, including my dad, my grama, and so many of my pets. My beloved German Shepherd Sasha who died when I was 13, my cat Kat who was the most awesome, coolest cat ever. He died in my arms when I was like 21 or so. Spunky, Autumn, Missy, Jr., Vixen. So many of my pets throughout my life. My Grama, Maddie was her nick-name (pronounced Mo-dey. It's Creole speak, don't ask lol) told me how much she loves me and always asks God to protect me and asks the angles to watch over me. She also to me to tell that to my cousin Dana. And my dad gave me the biggest hug and let me know that everything is going to be alright. He really wants me to move to NOLA. Seeing and actually feeling the presence of all of them so clearly was truly a wonderful present! Thank you!!

7. Which present do I give the world?-  The Chariot VII Rx- Uhh... Huh?? ...... I think it is telling me that the best gift I can give the world is for me to focus in nurturing my own Self. To be decisive in the direction I want to take my life and set that course on my souls GPS. STOP TRIPPIN' ABOUT HOW I AM GOING TO GET THERE! Just set the destination firmly in my mind's eye and the road will be shown to me. I also think it is saying I will be doing some serious traveling in June with regard to what gift I have to offer the world. Hmm...

8. & 9. Which major arcana forces stand by my side now?-  The Lovers VI and The Chariot VII- Ok, so you think the Chariot is trying to tell me something lol? I think the Lovers is speaking to that AofC and speaks very much toward the fact that I want to get married to someone with whom I am extremely compatible. That will happen because I have given a lot of thought on how to make better choices. I have been feeling that whoever "he" is, He is not far away at all. And this second Chariot says again that travel in this time period is definite. If I get The World XXI then I know for sure and it will be international. To stay focused! It's like his bow and arrow is pointing back at the Lovers, like one hell of a kick-ass Cupid lol.

10. Under which Ace does this time period stand?- Ace of Cups Rx-

11. What Ace does that the Universe wants to alert me to? - Ace of Wands- Get yo shit together with your tarot business damnit woman! And send out a few more flight attendant resumes!

12. Message from the Goddess via Shadows & Light Oracle- The Angel of Time #40 ~ "Working to hard!"- This deck always speaks to me with numerology and this tough chick is #40, the age I will be on Christmas. At first I was like, "Uh working to hard?? Is she kidding me?" Then I read the booklet. In short, she said I need to spend way less time on the computer, meditate, do yoga and eat right. And she said to "do this Now!" 

Outlook For a Relationship For a Querent

Someone asked me to do a romance reading about them and another person and asked me to use the Tarot of the Sweet Twilight. Let's see what it has to say.

1. Where things stand at this time- 6 of wands- This version of the card always makes me have to really think. Sometimes I will lay out just one card at a time. When this one comes up I know I have to take the other cards around it into very strong consideration. The 6ofW is known as "the victory card", but she is crying, so I usually question are these tears of sorrow or tears of joy? Given the rest of the cards in the reading I'd unfortunately say these are tears of sorrow. She is crying so hard, so many tears are streaming down her face, and she is all alone with no one to comfort her. The Jack -in-the box made me think of bad surprises. I see the spring and I feel him bobbing back and forth. There has been a lot of back and forth with this relationship.  I can hear that song by Loose Ends "Hangin' On a String". The girl has a far away look like she is so tired and in a daze. So all this to me says that the relationship is one of empty victories.  We all have to define what happiness is. I think the girl on the 6ofW is asking you to ask this of yourself.

2 What's blocking things from moving forward or to the next level- King of Swords- I had asked the querent what the other person's sun sign is and this card doesn't reflect the answer. But I wonder if it does still represent the other party. The KofSw is very inteligent and logical, all about practicality. He can be very charming and if intellect is something you find to be a sexy quality, and knowing the querent's sun sign I'd venture to say it is, then I can see the attraction. But the KofSw can also be very cold and detached. In fact his weapon of choice is his words and they can cut like a knife. That intellect that can be so attractive is his go-to weapon of choice. Again, knowing the querent's zodiac sign, I can see where that is like smoking Newport's in a box while standing next to a Exxon tanker. Shit is on and poppin'! And when I think of the elemental dignities of these two cards, fire and air, that just feeds the flame. It also makes me see that there is most likely a lot of passion between the two of them and maybe they feed off of the drama as well. I see all the storm clouds and the little girl in the background looks like she is pissed and giving the king a piece of her mind. She is by no means any shrinking violet! But he has his arms raised, like he is saying "What!?! What's the big deal man!?" It is also like the KofSw has his back turned to our girl on the 6ofSw who is in tears. What's blocking seems to be conflict, stress, detachment and drama.

3. What's best for the other person- 2 of swords- Basically, shit or get off the pot. They are at a crossroads and a decision needs to be made, but that means taking the blinders off and seeing things for what they are. The girl is posted so high out of the water on the chair. It says to me that the other party is not comfortable with their emotions much less anyone else's. The girl's arms are over her heart while she holds a sword. Is the other party very guarded and defensive because of past heartbreak or not having strong emotional connections of any kind? I hear the song by Blondie, "The tide is high but I'm holdin' on. I'm gonna be your number one." But this card and the others say to me that the only person who is number one is the one sitting in this chair. I wish this person would see that the answer to what is best for them is to make an actual decision. Use that cut and dry logic to cut the crap. And to open up some of that water/emotion that is right there and so accessible. It is such a gorgeous, inviting turquoise. Might wanna choose to at least test the waters with a toe. The 2ofSw says cut the shit or at call a truce.

4. What is best for the querent- Queen of Swords- I am really taking note to how many swords there are in this reading and not one cup. It pains me to say that does not bode well for a happy relationship. I love this version of the QofSw. She is strung up to a burning stake, but it is so clear that there is no need to worry about this Queen! This card advises that the best thing the querent can do is fight fire with fire so to speak but in the intellectual realm and give the other person's inner KofSw a worthy adversary and embrace their own inner QofSw. Remove themselves from a less than favorable situation while they still have the strength to do it. And if they feel like they don't, this queen screams otherwise. She is an extremely strong-willed assertive woman. Though she has a strong humanitarian side, mistake her kindness for weakness and watch her rip you a new ass with that sword! The QofSw is often known as the widow or single woman. I don't feel at all that that is their fate. The best thing I can advise the querent is to do is the take time and space alone to clear their head and they will figure out what is best  in the very near future easier than they may be able to right at this exact moment.

5. Advice- Knave (page) of pentacles- I had to go back and check, but my querent got this card in another reading in the same position. It is driving home the point that they need to take steps to begin their own journey and that can best be done on their own right now. Start now to lay the groundwork for what they want to come to fruition in the future. It also is reminding me that I feel that they are supposed to be with someone who is in some way very different or opposite to them. Someone very avant guard and a lot of fun, not at all down for the same-ole-same stuff couples usually do together. Like, their future mate will want to skydive, or go to a Foo Fighters concert. In Munich or Tokyo. But they will have the utmost respect for one another's differences. It will be what makes them a stronger and  unified front to stand up to anyone is stupid enough to try to make trouble or talk shit about their mate. The querent is a Scorpio. Huh...I sure hoe noone is that stupid. Trust! They will SO not get a good result!

6. Outcome if that advice is followed- 8 of pentacles- I see this relationship as a very important learning experience, something they can look back on to remember the good times that were shared but also to remind themselves of what they do and do not want out of a relationship.

I just got my beautiful new Shadows & Light oracle and since I know the querent loves this deck too, I just had to ask it for its take on things by pulling one card. I so wish I had something to say in this reading that is more along the lines of a happy outcome....
Three Witchy Sisters- The booklet says that the hats they wear connect them to celestial knowledge and "they often visit people who know that something isn't quite right, they just can't figure out what it is." And "Something that has jsut happened will happen twice, then three times. Something that has already happened twice will happen one more time. And something that has happened three times is now complete." The two sisters who have their eyes closed remind me of the 2ofSw from earlier and are saying to me that my dear querent has also been one to take a blind eye what is going on, or not going on, in this relationship. The triplet in the middle is confidently looking straight ahead with eyes wide open, and asking telling them to do the same.

Romance Reading

Someone asked me to do a reading on what is blocking them from true love, and requested I use my Tarot of the Sweet Twilight.  So let's see what the cards have to say:

1. What do you need in a relationship?
2. What you will bring to a relationship?
3. What behaviors or beliefs are blocking you from what you want?
4. How can you transform those things to put you on the path to get what you want?
5. Outcome if you follow the advice of card 4.

1. The Empress III- You are all about the love and passion! The Empress is ruled by the planet Venus. You love romance and need to be courted and treated like the precious gift you are, even to be spoiled. But this can NEVER come at the price of your independence. I'd also say that your...eh-hem... shall we say... "earthly desires"... Oh hell, we're all adults here! You are NOT playing about your sex! LOL You are very sensual and adventurous and sex is a huge part of how you express your love for your partner. You also need to nurture and to be nurtured in return.  But I wonder if this can lead to problems by you finding men with mamma issues. Either they are mamma's boys or they don't have good relationships with their moms and expect you to fill that role. You are extremely protective of your partner and loyalty is of the utmost importance. Not just fidelity, but let's say someone was mistreating you or being unfair. Even if you were somehow wrong in the situation, your mate had better defend you tooth and nail in front of others, and be a little careful when mentioning the situation in private as well. You are very emotional and can be a bit moody, but your love is as rock solid as Mother Earth herself, and you need a rock solid commitment.

2. 4 of Wands- This is known as the marriage card. You are looking for the real deal and are looking for a partner who will be your rock, your refuge. Again, I feel that passion is a key component and you have plenty of it given the fire of a wand card, but you will bring a lot of stability, comfort and security with it. Your partner can come to you and talk and express their deepest, inner-most feelings or fears and know they have your total attention and concern. (This also may be where you need to watch for the mamma issues. You may want to take over and fix things, in stead of letting them handling their own problems and you just stand by and support them) You also have the ability to make them feel at ease just by your presence because you are very intuitive and aware of what is going on inside of them. You make your partner feel inspired and motivated to work at creating a good relationship because you are.

3. 9 of cups- You may not be getting what you want because you may have a few unrealistic expectations. This also shows that you may tend to be extremely emotional and get swept away with the fairy tales we were all sold about what love is/should be. I'd also say a bit more inner transformation with regard to self-love needs to take place.

4. 2 of swords- Find balance between your head and your heart. I feel like you get swept away with the passion and emotion and don't always see things for what the really are and that makes you either turn cold or lash out at the other person. But before you get involved, this card is telling me you need to take a good long look at what you really want so you can make better choices. Sometimes even if we don't know what it is we want, we know what we sure as hell don't want. Write those things down in two lists and then refer back to it to make sure the choices you make in partners is in sync with your choices on the list.
    Another thing it's saying is about communication. Start working on how you communicate with others you are close to now so that you'll have better skills with your partner.  I'm wondering if you clam up when you are upset and then when your emotions get to a point you can no longer hold them in, you come on like a hurricane and slice them to ribbons with the words you use. Make sure you get enough alone time to sort through the things in your head, but don't make your partner feel like an outcast when you do. Explaining that this is crucial to you feeling even and balanced and that it doesn't mean you don't love them or that you are rejecting them will go a long way.

5. Knave (page) of pentacles- You have the strong potential to set the ground work for a solid and stable relationship. I love to see pentacles in romance readings because of they symbolize growth and strength that is long term and steady, not fly-by-night. Being a page, this also addresses healthy communication skills. If follow the advice of the previous cards, you can end up feeling confident about the choices you make and get tangible results. For some reason I feel like your mate may not fit the "norm" of who you or others around you may expect or think you should be with. But as long as you both share the same values and goals, you'll have something that is healthy and has the potential to evolve and grow.

Electric Feel

I had an interesting dream last night. I'm so glad to be dreaming so vividly again!! There was an older, light-skinned lady and she was tell me about her amazing life. I could hear "Rebel Rebel" in my head for real as I saw her as a young girl passing out flyers on stage while The Stones and David Bowie performed. (how crazy is it that I just saw Mick Jagger preform on The Grammys!) Her husband was in the Navy. Then I saw her yard outside and there was a beautiful rose bush full of bright coral blooms. We were in her house and my mom was in the other room. The lady and I were in the kitchen. She whispered in my ear, "I own 3 houses. A girl has to always be prepared to take care of herself. " Somehow I knew she was trying to let me know she was leaving one to me.  Then I look out the window and see a helicopter flying very low and about to crash in the front yard. I ran and saw Mom running ahead of me. We saw the pilot's face, how he was trying to remain calm but it was inevitable and it came twirling to the ground.
We see the light from the blast and we go outside, only now there isn't a yard but a dock and lots of water. The Navy and Coast Guard are there. They tell us to jump. Mom says she won't because she can swim (the woman is petrified of water in real life!) and I can't. I remember thinking "WTF didn't I take swmming lessons!!?" I see lots of rescue boats and a large bridge not far away. (Then the barking of chihuahuas in real life woke me up as they tried to attack the Jehovah's Witnesses LMAO!)

4 of Wands, Knight of Wands and 2 of Swords with the 10 of Cups on the bottom. (second time today of the 2ofSw). First thing I saw was the rainbow and heard "rainbow moment". (Since I have no scanner and the photos suck, you can't see the dam rainbow, but it's there. I'll add a link so you can see a few images and get a feel for how gorgeous the deck is.) While I was here in Atlanta I had what I have now named "a rainbow moment" which I had while talking to Jeanette and actually forming a friendship with her. We were talking about me telling this really cute but totally weird-vibe-having guy that I was not going to go out with his ass. It all translates into me learning to say No! If I mean no, to say NO and mean it and be fine with it! The happy, safe home life pictured on the 10ofC is so my new room mate's house! Her cat and dog look just like this and are the best of friends and sleep together just like that! I think it all translates into making better, smarter choices(2ofSw) and taking decisive action to live my life with passion and vibrancy (Knt of W) to have the home life and marriage I want.  The Knt of Wands is so the kind of man I want! (Still got it for one in particular but that is a whole 'nother crazy story of what will never be in spite of how he makes my heart feel. And a whole lot of other parts on me!!! DAMN the man is amazing!!! Ugghhh!! I gotta hit that at least one more time!! but this is another long story for another time.) Well, with the maturity of the King of Wands!! But this is who I want to cultivate within my own self and thus attract! This knight is the one is is like electricity! He's fun and alive and will skydive,(as pictured on the Vanessa Tarot!) have fun, a joy to be around, funny, out going, and crazy hot passionate hot sex! (Mmmm..I can see Rain from Ninja Assassin in the knight's helmet today!) To plan and execute them better so I am prepared for the unexpected shit that can change your life in an instant. Also so that when I  am old and grey I can look back with no regrets and say I have lived a wonderful life worth living and did all the things I truly wanted. And there is SOO much more I want to do!

Omg, I can't believe what song just came on Pandora!! I have got to add the lyrics so as to really make it clear how profound this is LOL!!!


Electric Feel by MGMT
All along the western front
People line up to receive
She got the power in her hand
To shock you like you won't believe
Saw her in the Amazon
With the voltage running through her skin
Standing there with nothing on
She's going to teach me how to swim

Said oh, girl
Shock me like an electric eel
Baby girl
Turn me on with your electric feel
I said oh, girl
Shock me like an electric eel
Baby girl
Turn me on with your electric feel

All along the eastern shore
Put your circuits in the sea
This is what the world is for
Making electricity
You can feel it in your mind
Oh, you can do it all the time
Plug it in and change the world
You are my electric girl

Said oh, girl
Shock me like an electric eel
Baby girl
Turn me on with your electric feel
Said oh, girl
Shock me like an electric eel
Baby girl
Turn me on with your electric feel

Do what you feel now
Electric feel now
Do what you feel now
Electric feel now
Do what you feel now
Electric feel now
Do what you feel now
Electric feel now
Do what you feel now
Electric feel now 

Lessons Learned

The first thing I thought of when I saw the first card was my sister in Atl who I have been visiting. It's the Chinese goddess NuKua (my sister is half Chinese). The 8 of Pentacles is all about learning, education and promotion. As I looked at the picture I thought of how I taught her about Nichiren Buddhism. Also how much I have learned about my life while I have been here and how much she has taught me, especially about the amazing, unbreakable bond we have after almost a lifetime of friendship. Of how she helped me to pull myself out of the nasty mud of depression I was in, and put up with my crazy ass and still loved me through it . So I decided to look up some more info in NuKua and will add a link to that. Thalia Took, creator of The Goddess Oracle Deck, said, "She is the tempering influence that calms situations and brings level-headedness." (I have been watching the creation of this deck for years and can NOT WAIT for it to be complete so I can be one of the first to purchase it!) This really sums up how my sister has helped me deal with the craziness that has just unfolded in my life. I also notice the huge bright light that looks like a portal that the people are walking into as they leave Her. It says to me that I am leaving ATL to walk into a very bright future.

The next card says the choice is mine, the 2 of Swords. It also says not to be angry with my old room mate, to choose to bury the hatchet that I literally have been feeling with the stabbing pains between my shoulder blades.  Also not to forget the lessons learned and to make much better choices about my life. The presence of earth cards and an air card shows I need to not be so fixed and be more flexible so I can take decisive action, something I suck at.

The  on the bottom of the deck says the bottom line is to see how very fortunate I am and actually have always been throughout my life in so many ways no matter how dark things may have been and to be grateful for all the many blessings I have been given and the good fortune I have created.
Also how very fortunate I am that my sister found me after all these years!!!  Aces are all about new beginnings, and we have a whole new beginning to our relationship. And I have a whole new beginning to my life. The A of P is all about something firmly rooted that continues to grow and prosper and produce tangible results that are quite valuable.

This woman's quilting I found on Flickr is so beautiful and I really like her interpretation on the Goddess NuKua.