Monday, September 12, 2011

Follow If You've Been Down the Same Road

So I saw a post on Craigslist for an apartment. I had seen it last week but I dragged my feet and didn't act on it so I thought in my indecision it was gone. I saw it just now and was like, " this a second chance??" So I whipped out my Faulkner Tarot and did a 3 card. First row is the pros of taking it, the second is the cons:

Row 1: 9 of Swords, 3 of wands, 0 The Fool
....Ok...this is pretty damn clear...Hello Krysten!! 9ofSw is the nightmare card, and I had one last night. Taking this place will end the insane amount of stress that being in limbo is causing. The sleeplessness, the nightmares, the clenching my teeth which leads to my hair falling out of my damn head (lovely!) and the endless tape recording of thoughts reminding me of how fucked up things are. The graveyard scene on this card says to put those ghosts to rest. I'm not really living right now, just kinda existing, floating from place to place, like a ghost. The church window shows I need to go inside a safe place. (Like a permanent place of residence...ya think!) The 3ofW shows a deal has been made, there is a fair exchange. Funny, yesterday I kept hearing the phrase "fair exchange is no robbery". The Fool 0 is all about taking a risk. He has no fear, he makes the decision to take a leap of faith and he goes for what he wants. He has trust that his experience mixed with the love of the Universe will lead him down the right path. The bright sky and the rainbow stands out most to me-- good luck from out of the blue. I think the Fool also means a house move as the Brits say. The elemental dignities work great in this trio. Fire is flanked by two air cards. The fuel needed to take action, make decisions, is present to feed and strengthen my will.

Row 2: Page of Pentacles, Queen of Swords, The Chariot VII
Again, the glaringly obvious....the Page of P shown here is adorable little Lola in reality, but the cards are telling me that I know EXACTLY who she is in this reading...ME. My inner child! I'm supposed to be the QofP but I'm not acting like a mature, responsible adult,  but like the scared little girl who loves to get lost to fantasy, just like Lola in her princess gown and feather tierra as she hides from the world behind her wand. The wand also says I have exactly what it takes to create the magick I want to occur in my life, but like the Buddhist proverb says, "A sword in the hands of a coward is useless." Which is exactly what the QofSw is thinking as she looks back at the Page. The QofSw is a very bold, direct, balls-to-the-walls decisive woman. She cuts through the shit and keeps it moving! And The Chariot shows the back and forth time and time again I've been  doing will only continue. Hell, it literally shows it! Philly to New Orleans! The constant moving from pillow to post I've done the since last Nov! And when I think of elemental dignities, this poor QofSw is in utter hell in this position. She is trapped between earth that won't budge and water that is too wishy-washy! And together those two are just making mud!

Ok....time to call the guy about the place. And get over the fear of him thinking I'm a total flake and telling me to kiss off. Which is really just my Shadow sides opinion of me huh....


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