Beltane 2012 ~ Stoking the Fires of Passion Part II

There are several Gods and Goddess associated with Beltane. Mine is Freyja. She kicks some serious serious ass.

Here is a list of others you may want to research:
Gods
• Cupid
• Orion
• Odin
• Pan
• Dionysis
• Frey
• The Green Man

Goddesses

• Erzulie

• Freyja

• Flora

• Aphrodite

• Xchotiquetzal

• Diana

• Sheila-na-Gig

• Chuang-Mu

I dedicated myself to the Norse goddess  Freyja in 2002. I wanted a goddess who encompassed a wide spectrum of qualities I wanted to cultivate and she totally fit the bill. I decided to rededicate myself to her and what better day than Beltane. She is goddess of love, beauty, sex, sensuality, passion, magick, divination, and as leader of the Valkyries, war. Animals sacred to Her are cats, falcons, wild boar, and swans. Other things include amber, primrose, strawberry, marigolds, primrose, both the sun and moon, Friday (Freyja's day), and the number 13. So Friday the 13th is a lucky day for those of us who follow Her. 

Here is my reading for myself. I used the Gill Tarot.
*Due to the mature subject matter and sexual content, viewer discretion is advised*

1. How can I best utilize my creativity? - Princess of Swords - Free your mind, your ass'll follow. Every creation begins with an initial thought. I have been learning to be more mindful of my thoughts. What you think about you create. That is what manifestation is. That's what magick is. This princess has very single-minded focus. Look at how cloudy the sky is all around her, But above her is a clear and brightly carved out path. I need to have very clear intentions and crystal vision. hmm... I just saw the Crystal Visions Tarot in my mind's eye and I happen to be listening to Stevie Nicks right now. I will make that my next deck I purchase. It will somehow help me to tap into my creativity. The fact that she a page shows I am still in the learning phase. Her blue gown represents the throat chakra, telling me to continue to speak my own truth, To be very clear in my communication.
Another thing is how important music is to my healing process, dare I say vital.
I just got this card when I did the post about Tex. He reminds me of the cat who starred in the movie Thor. And here we see a royal of the Air court who is controlling the weather and using a sword like he uses his hammer Mjolnir. I have never been more upfront and clear in my communication than I have with him. I will continue to do so.
I also knowI need to apply with more airlines. Like this is a student of the realm of Air.

2. What do I need to do to stoke the fires of passion in my life? - High Priestess II - This card was also in that post. And I have shuffled and used the deck several times since then. I need to see myself as a Queen, as a vibrant, young(ish), healthy woman who has extreme depth to her personality. And who has sex! Oye vey, it's been a VERY long time! What am I saving it for, marriage LMAO! A lot of people associate this card with the Blessed Mother, the pure virgin. I always associate it with an alluring seductress, like Angelina Jolie! Though I adore and honor Mary, I wanna be Ang! I'm jus sayin'.
I also need to enjoy my solitude and get re-acquainted with mySelf. I used this card in a meditation on Persephone back in 2004 and I just thought of that. I may need to revisit with Her.

3. How can I ensure that I have a healthy sexual belief system? -  Death XIII Rx - Alright, this is bananas. When I do a reading, I pick up each card one at a time and randomly slide it into the deck in various spots so the same cards are not stacked together. This is the 3rd card from the reading about Thor, wth?! Anywho, I need to resurrect my sex life! I ain't a virgin and I ain't dead, so why the hell am I acting like it! I do know why y'all. Since 2004, I have had about 8 or 9 Tower events back to back. No pun intended, 2 events were with regard to damaging 9 disks in my spine. Others included my father dying and hurricane Kartina to name a few. So getting laid simply was not a top priority, ya know. Getting out of bed, physical therapy for several years, dealing with FEMA, battling a horrible depression, those were the kinds of things that were at the forefront of my mind. Ya know, things like, a place to live, no job, no money, supporting someone in Iraq, my hair falling out of my head. Those kinds of things. I turned off many aspects of mySelf, starting with the sensuous being I used to be. I've never been one to cat around, but in a committed relationship I am quite..eh-HEM, amorous! *evil grin* I owned one pair of flat shoes that I only wore when working international flights until I fell. Nothing less that 3" heels. I did my make-up most of the time, beautiful shades  of eyeshadow and my nails were ALWAYS done. Do you hear me? AL WAYS!! Since I was 19 years old! Now I live in workout gear, Nikes, and I have ugly, crappy nails. (that really pains my very soul you guys, for real). Well Freyja is telling me with this card that it is time for rebirth of Krysten, or as they nick-named me in flight attendant training, Diva! This card often times means there will be a 3 month period of metamorphosis. So that puts me at August, Lammas. Or possibly Halloween/Samhain.
This card is ruled by Pluto, which deals with crisis management and sexual deviance. I need to resurrect my inner dirty girl lol. Yay!!!

4. How can I shed light on the pleasures life has to give? - Strength VIII Rx - Believe in myself, plain and simple. Face my fears and be the Cowardly Lion after he realized he had heart all along. Embrace my inner Domme. Like She-Ra from Saturday morning cartoons lol.  I just realized how much she resembles Freyja.

5. How can I strengthen my union with my partner? - 5 of pentacles Rx - Well, my potential partner, whoever he may be. Stop seeing my short comings. That bright red calls to mind my blown out root chakra. My chiropractor even said that sex would alleviate my back pain to a large extent. See, it's therapeutic lmao! And don't get caught up and start trippin' on the fact that he most likely makes a very decent amount of money and my ass is poor as a church mouse. See myself as worthy of a great guy, and make sure he is worthy of the valuable things I have to offer. Don't create problems where there are none Krysten. And learn better money management skills.

6. What magnificent creation in my life am I not aware of? - 9 of wands - Oooh I like this card in this position! 9's mean it's just about or it is over. The 9ofW says, hang in there baby, you're in the home stretch! It has been a long, hard road out of Hell, but be on guard for the beginning of the end. The word "preparation" is written on it, with the candles lighting the way like torches in the night. Keep your head high and don't give up. Pace myself and know I am surrounded by more protective forces than I even know.

7. How can I exhibit more Self love? -  Princess of Cups - this is such a beautiful PofC. I hear the line from finding Nemo, "Just keep swimming!" She is a mermaid, and she will not change just to try to please someone else. True self love and self acceptance are a bit new to me, but I am getting the hang of it. Continue to be patient and kind with mySelf. Watch what I say about myself, speak positively about me. Remain open to the love of the Goddess. And use my intuitive gifts to guide mySelf to peaceful and emotionally safe and health situations. The more of love and compassion I show myself the more I will attract from others.

               "For the honor of Grey Skull! I have the power!"

Toy Box

I'm not sure if I've written anything about a possilbe money making opportunity or not. It would be for a company called Passion Parties, which is....shall we call them.."love toys" lol. One of my nearest and dearest put me intouch with a friend of her's who does it and makes a nice little penny doing so. The start up cost is more than I have right now. So she emailed me today with an idea that would cost me only about $30. So I wanted to ask the cards what would be the result if I go this route.

The first card is the Knight of Wands. I need to go back and check, but I'm almost sure Rhiannon says that this is the best possible bussiness card.---- Omg I am just listening to her YouTube video and she says "they have got the gift of gab and could sell snow to the Eskimos! They don't lie, they expand the truth. It is THE best card linked to business, utter success!" She says it has teh gypsy meaning of a journey over water and quite possibly one linked to bussiness. Wands energy are all about fire and passion, so how perfect that the business in question is directly related to wands of passion LMAO!! Now as I look at the card I see the happy couple in a passionate embrace. Hell, I just realized all of the cards are wands!! The suite of passion and fire! The 9 of Wands shows me if I do this venture, with the sword pointed down and the wands standing tall. To me this says that the arguing and lack of communication could be put to rest for many couples if their sex life improved. I also read in a book once that the 9ofW in a relationship reading means that if the couple can get through this one major issue, it will soloidify their union. The last card is the victory card, the 6 of Wands. This card is such an odd version to me. I take her tears as tears of joy that these couples will have when they deepen the intimacy of their relationship. Maybe even my own at being able to help these couples. And uh.... well, there is a "toy in a.....box" pictured.... LMAO---I'm just sayin'!! Which reminds me of one of the funniest skits Ive ever seen in my life with Adam Samburg and Justin Timberlake!

An Interview With the Tarot of the Sweet Twilight

I just got my Tarot of the Sweet Twilight and couldn't be happier with it! The colors are so vivid and gorgeous! I'll be so glad when I have a scanner so the true beauty of the cards can be seen. They are so dream-like, so rich and vibrant! Looking at them is not like looking at still pictures, but at very slow motion videos. They remind me of a Johnny Depp/Tim Burton colaboration. I think I may have to start reviewing my decks because I have so many and I love them all. But I can say that this one will remain very high on my list of favorites! Anyway, I remembered a spread I saw on the blog of a wonderful lady (a fellow Capricorn--tee-hee hee!) names Lisa from the UK. Please check out her blog, as I have included a link to it. She has created two other blogs and doesn't update this one very often anymore which I am very sad to say because I learned so much from her. But she has tons of entries and is very passionate about tarot as means of healing. This spread is really cool because it gives you a chance to explore what a particular deck has to offer and how to best communicate with it.


        An Interview With the Tarot of the Sweet Twilight
8 of Pentacles: This card jumped out as I was shuffling. This deck will make me a stronger reader, give me the training I need to advance my skills and to finally take it pro. It has a lot to teach me. The pentacles that are buried show my potential for improving my skills. I need to relax and soak up the knowledge.

1. What is your most important characteristic? The Wheel of Fortune X
I own so many decks, had so many ups and downs, been round and round with myself about if I am or ever will be a "good" or "qualified" reader. The first thing that stands out in this card is the little girl's ears. I will be able to hear my guides even better. It will force me to have to listen to them and to trust that they won't let me fall. The Wheel also has a strong association to money, so I'm really feeling that I will use this deck to make money. Is that a broken heart or a set of lips at the bottom of the tree?? It will enable me to speak to people with compassion to bring healing and honesty. This is also my card in numerology that is the sum of my birthday (I forget what it is called) so I have a strong connection to it and the Magician I. This deck is going to prove to be very important to my growth as a reader.

2. What are your strengths? Ace of Swords
Well if this doesn't make all the sense in the world lol. This Ace is all about a new beginning that you may not think you are ready for and may even be forced upon you, so it is kinda scary. But you will be so glad you went for the ride. This deck is so bold, look at the explosion of vibrant colors and the raw emotions. This gorgeous woman is so calm and so confident as she pulls her sword out of its scabbard. This deck is confident so it expects I will honor it by being so as well. It's strength is in cutting through the shit that causes me to doubt myself.

3. Limitations? 9 of Wands
In the LWB it says "the joy of actually making it pushes tiredness into the background." I'm not sure is if this deck has any limits except any that I impose upon it. The girl has the sword in her hands. It's like she has gone from in the Ace of Swords to this place carrying her confidence, or it has carried and sustained her. She has come from those clouds in the background, the dark times of mot having a clear mind or not always knowing where she is going to end up, but she persevered and now she is on top. This woman says there are no limits once you work beyond your fear and doubt.

4. What are you here to teach me? 4 of Cups
Stop moping, get of your ass, and take action. She's sitting on top of the house. I've got to get out of the house and do readings and not just sit here and to them on my computer. Or if I do, branch out and do reading over the web. She has wings, yet she refuses to fly!! And she is fishing from a tiny cup and not from a lake, river or ocean; stop selling myself short and limiting myself.

5. How can I best work with you? Queen of Wands
This Queen is the mover and shaker. She's active and alive. She is all about work and energy. She is a career woman who can balance all the various aspects of her busy life. Here she looks so sad because she is alone and just standing there. This Queen thrives on being busy. The flowers around her head say she has so many beautiful thoughts that deserve to be expressed and shared with others. It reminds me of the most beautiful compliment any man has ever given me, and he is the King of Wands (maybe more of the Knight--grow up please), but he told me "you have the most beautiful mind of anybody I have ever known." I can best work with this gorgeous deck by seeing my own beauty and by by embracing the fact that this is a viable source of income!

6.Potential outcome: Death XIII
Something big is gonna jump of in the next three months. This card is associated with the sign of Scorpio, which is the sign of depth and passion. I am so passionate about tarot and helping others to empower themselves through it. This may be the most beautiful Death XIII card I have ever seen. It's like she is just sleeping and the Grim Reaper is more like experience and wisdom that is carrying her to the next phase, getting her away from the barren surroundings that are so desolate. The potential outcome is awakening me, transforming my gift and breathing life into my readings.

Bottom Line: The Hanged Man XII
Break free from my own self-imposed restrictions. I've been bullshitting for to long. This can be the dawn of a new day for me as a reader, so stop reading damn tarot books and just read the damn cards woman!

Daily Reading 3/6/11

Well I see what this is in reference to straight away. The card at the bottom of the deck, the 8 of cups, is exactly what this is all about. My old room mate telling me I needed to find another place to live while I was out of town. And we can see me leaving out with my bag in this card. The 5 of swords makes me nervous that this is gonna get even nastier. She called me yesterday. It's like she wants to act like nothing ever happened and out interaction is to continue just like any other day. I was polite, but not warm. At the end of the conversation she said I love you. I just said goodbye. I heard her laugh as she was hanging up, as if to say to me that she took note of that and say to hell with me too. The 4 of pentacles shows the fact that I have no savings because I have gone through it since my back has been hurt. In the 9 of wands, that's me, hot under the collar and feeling under the gun because since my name is not on a lease, that could end up happening again. I woke up several times through out the night thinking of yesterday's phone interaction and feeling so anxious and unsettled. I have got to take charge of my life and stop putting myself in situations where others have power over me and can choose to use it against me when I least expect it. 

3 Cards, All 3 Are 10's

I'm so tired, but I had to ask the cards about a situation. I wrote an email today and the very very short version of the story is that I  told certain someone today that I needed to distance myself from him because I feel more for him that he feels for me or is capable of showing. I was a big girl and made sure that I was very honest but not all "girl' and melodramatic and doing the emotional blackmail crap. So I asked the cards just now what is going on with him in light of that. I tried a little trick Rhiannon taught me where as to imagine a huge sailors rope coming from around me and crossing in a figure 8 and looping around him to feel his energy. (If you try this always be sure that at the end of the reading you are doing, imagine a huge pair of scissors cutting the rope and free the connection. You do not want to remain pulling and carrying around another's emotions like that! It's not healthy for either party.) Since there is such a strong bond between us, this was not at all hard to do with him. I instantly felt sick to my stomach and very heavy and confused. I used my Universal Goddess deck which is one of my very favorite decks and became the one I used for readings about him or us. Here are the cards:
 10 of Swords, 10 of Pentacles, and The Wheel of Fortune X

3 cards, all 10's. WTF.

An ending, a new beginning, and a cycle that continues. The 10 of Pentacles shows what I want. I'm 39, no kids and never been married. He's 37,  has 3 kids and is an amazing single dad. I want to get married. To him?? Not sure, but I at least want a serious, committed relationship with him to find that out. I love how warm and inviting the Japanese goddess Ben Satien is and that's what I want. A warm home filled with love and family and friends. We both love to have people over and eat and hang out. And this card is about family and legacy. I told him today that "I am not happy with how my life is going and that at 39 I need to get my head out of my ass and get my shit together". 10 of Swords shows how we both feel in a lot of ways. I'm not at all a victim in this, but I am sad because I don't want it to be this way. Take note of the gold ring in the water. He's sad because to quote the LWB "I am the innocent victim of a cruel curse. I am alone, afraid and desperate in this gloomy forest." Now though he would never in a million years say this, it describes a lot of what he feels. In addition to other personal issues, he is an Iraq War Veteran. That kinda says it all. And then there is The Wheel X. The those white flowers Arianrhod has floating about makes me think of how I threw caution to the wind by being extremely upfront in telling him what I did without any expectation. Hope? Yes, but no expectations. I live as the complete east coast and he one the complete west. If I were still a flight attendant, this would be totally workable. But as of the foreseeable future, I'm not one. She looks so free, and there is a certain freedom from taking the weight off of myself by being so upfront. The Wheel of Fortune is about karma and fate and the ups and downs of life. We have had many many ups and downs and there is an extremely strong karmic connection between us. One way is the fact that his mother who is on the other side talks to me so often. But I had to say what I did today. And I feel like those flowers are saying "let the chips fall where they may". The blue of her dress says be at peace with whatever happens.

I wonder what getting three 10's means!? I know 10's are all about starting over, re-generation. For me they are also about a transition. I see 9's as an ending, and 1's as a new beginning, but 10's as that in between phase of regrouping and transition from one phase to the next. Kinda like Purgatory for Catholics. And I am tired of feeling like I'm in limbo with this cat.

The bottom card is one that I so very often get with him, the 9 of Wands. (So we have three 10's and one 9......) I absolutely love this interpretation of this card! It is by far my favorite 9ofW in any deck. It is the goddess of the winter solstice, Angerona. The LWB says it so beautifully, " Silence is the mother that never asks questions but welcomes you silently between her benevolent arms when you are tired and uncertain." How beautiful is that. And since he lives in Portland, those evergreens covered in snow are so fitting. The snow on the wooden fence post to symbolize the rods is like telling him it's ok to stop fighting, lay down your arms, the war is over my baby. I see myself posed as Angerona is, welcoming him home, not asking pointed questions or forcing him to discuss anything, though I know he needs to free himself of the pain in his soul. And most of all, not judging, just greeting him with acceptance and love.

As far as E.D. , there is one


For shits and giggles, I decided to turn over another card. Don't you know it was the King of Wands. He's a Sag.

ATL-PHL: Moving Day 2/15/11

I'm on the plane right now on the way back to Philly. Today's message is  instantly clear to me. Don't worry about the things that have brought me down or could keep me in a state of depression because I have so much to be grateful for. I have created a lot of good fortune and I will be receiving a lot of it today.

I got the 4 of Cups, 6 of Pentacles, and the 9 of Wands. (very surprised there are only minor arcana.) When I look t the 4ofC today it's like I see myself seeing things that I want but I don't have. I have to believe that I can acquire anything I want, I just have to believe that it is possible, focus, and work for it. It's also saying to me that I can not sit around the house anymore, I have got to be active and go do things in spite of how broke I am right now. The 6ofP is the fact that Helen has offered for me to stay with her. And hell, I won't have to every say again that I actually live in fucking New Jersey LOL!! Ugh!!  I also feel like that may be her mamma Carol saying she wants Helen to do it. And not just Helen, but how many wonderful people who love and care about me and are so kind a gracious to me! I am one lucky ass chick!!! The 9ofW says for me to not be defensive and angry or bitter, but to use my energy to get my life on the track I want to be on.  I do have somewhere to go for now. In this deck, this card represents the Winter Solstice; it's always darkest before the dawn. That now is the time to let go and release old patterns that aren't good for me and plan for the future I want to create. 9's are about transition and wands are energy, creativity, drive, work, passion. I have a lot of hard work ahead of me, but I also have a whole lot to be grateful for.