Today's card is from a really nice oracle deck my friend Toby gave me a while back and I just busted open. It's the Animal Messages Oracle from Suzie Green. I drew Badger. "Abandon compromise and fight valiantly for what you believe in." The first thing I think of is that hilarious video that went viral about the honey badger. "Honey badger don't give a shit, it takes what it wants!" I had to contact the phone line I just got hired by to work on the last items I need to take care of to finalize things in order to be activated as a reader for them. I've been dragging my feet because things are not ideal for me to start doing this. I know this card is telling me to fight the bullshit that fear keeps whispering in my ear that will cause me to end up missing out on this opportunity. Don't be a chicken, be a honey badger and take this opportunity I want! And was given to me directly from LaSirene!
And so I did. Just spoke to the woman who was super nice and so excited for me to start. And told me to worry about getting better since I sound like hell with all this congestion. I'm so grateful for this new opportunity to bring in more money and grow as a reader. It is also a reminder to be aggressive and assertive to go after the things I want in general.
I have so much respect for those of you who can post everyday, the lovely Chloe at Inner Whispersbeing the first who comes to mind. I swear that woman would give Linda Carter a run for her money. I'm in awe of her seemingly effortless energy given the multitiude of responsibilities she has. So I've decided to attempt to challenge myself to make a post a day. This means I'd do wise to keep my posts very short and not go into too much depth when interpreting the cards. Not at all my style. But I think this will prove to be extremely beneficial, maybe even imperative. As a professional reader, I always go way over the scheduled time. Combined with the fact that my readings tend to go very deep, it's killing me y'all. I. Am. SO fucking burned out! And given the many challenges in my personal life, some of which include getting hit by a taxi while riding my bike and my brother being killed two weeks after that, I am about to fall apart - and not necessarily at he seams. But I digress... This whole giving-till-it-hurts bullshit really comes down to my own insecurities and not feeling like I'm giving enough, which I suppose means not feeling like I'm good enough. So on that note, I'm gonna hush with explaining myself and start my new discipline.
Question: Should I start doing a post a day?
Card 1. If I do? - Queen of Wands - Ha! My "Wonder Woman" card! I will have such a rewarding feeling of accomplishment and pride. It will prove to me what everyone else seems to see so clearly, that I am an amazing reader. I will think more highly of mySelf, adopt more of a Leo attitude of confidence and get back to see tarot as a joy, not drudgery. An awful truth, but that's what it it on the verge of becoming. Look how that candle to the right (the future) is almost melted to nothing.
*Crystal Visions Tarot from U.S. Games
Card 2. If I don't? - Knight of Pentacles - Dear God look how tired this guy and his horse is! I need to work smarter, NOT harder! Nothing more need be said!
I haven't gotten a chance to use my Ludy Lescott deck and I've been dying to. It's a concept deck and it is set in New Orleans. It's a pretty dark deck, but y'all know I love those as well as the graphic novel style or artwork.
So I decided to keep shit simple tonight. I'm tired and want to take a hot shower and read my book, so I asked - What was today about?
First off, the elements are Earth/Earth/Fire. The day did start of slow and I was not feeling like doing a damn thing, bu then I got a second wind and some pep and was fired up to go to another parade. The energy of a parade is electric. Which if you are up to the task and you like that kind of thing, it's fantastic. If not, it would just be exhausting and sux rocks.
1. Work - Queen of Pentacles - Well we are off to a very accurate start. This is my significator since I'm a Capricorn. And I had back to back readings all day long, so did make some money. As I look at the background, it makes me think of sunrise. Even though I woke up at 11:00 I didn't get enough sleep and felt like I was getting up early. I see her sitting in quite, peaceful solitude. Damn I sure did want to have that. But I had to sit on my reading throne (just chair with some pillows) and focus on offering beauty and hope to others like this queen is as she offers this rose.
The white rabbit here has a lot of meaning. One thing is the joke I cracked. It just popped out of my mouth, almost like it was Spirit speaking, not me, cause the shit was real crazy lol! I joked that I was going to have a baby with a King of Pentacles friend who is incredibly precious and means the entire world to me. (we both have a terrible crush on each other, but... It's complicated. Very! And no! It's not another chick or anything like that!) He moved away and I haven't heard from him and I've been a bit worried. But I got 2 signs back to back when I went to Bacchus tonight (a major Mardi Gras parade) that I will hear from or see him soon. This is another sign. It even makes me wonder if he is like this rabbit hiding in plain sight, sitting right in the train if her gown, watching over her. He would do that lol.
2. Love/romance - 2 of Pentacles - this card makes me think of wondering where and how my KofP. She has that longing on her face as she looks off into the fast wilderness, but she doesn't appear to be sad or pining. She seems quite content and positive. It also brings to mind 2 suitors from the recent past who both reappeared with in 2 days of each other. (Suitors lol. I'm so strangley old fashioned sometimes I crack myself up!) Both great guys, but it would never work with either. I see them as the two disks carved out of the marble railing. This woman is paying no attention to them. Her gaze is fixed on the horizon, patiently keeping watch, her graceful hand over her heart. Is it to protect it? Or is it because she has finally accepted the reality that she is waiting to give it to a specific someone?
3. Friendship - Ace of Wands - This is my dear friend Michealle. The top frill of her corset and collar make me think if the gorgeous clothes she let me borrow for the Vampyer Ball this past Halloween. And she is a fire sign, an Aries. For a wand, this chick is lookin' real serious, real dry, real unenthused. My friend is coming to some new realizations about things in her life that are completely draining her of her energy and any kind of joy. She's kinda past the crying stage and the screaming mad stage. She's like this babe. Ova tha bullshit. Anger means possible hope. Apathy means that's a rap folks.
The other thing I notice is the hand extending the cane. We have been each other's support through quite a number if things over the past few months. Neither of us even has to ask. The love, support and hope for new possibilities and reasons to remain optimistic are always offered. We are very lucky to have each other to have a shoulder to cry on and to remind each other to keep our head up.
I really like this deck and I'm so excited to see how in tune I am with it. I'm going to have to do a review on it and use it in a reading on CreoleMoon.blogspot.com
Hello all, I know it's been forever and 2 days since I blogged on here. It's nice to be back since on the blog where I am 100%, unapologetically Krysten. I've been trying to do more with my CreoleMoon.blogspot.com blog (I'm not as raw, nor is it as personal. If you know about this one, please check that one out, but I'm not publisizing this one over there. If they trip over this one, whatever.) Then there was the shit show that was Nov 27-Dec 24! Omfg! What a fucking nightmare! The short version, oral surgery! Dear Lord Baby Jesus the pain. Cliff Notes: a piece of drill bit from a root canal done 15-20 years ago was left on the root of my lower left molar. Yes.... You read that correctly. So after all these years my body took notice and decided to reject the foreign object. That caused decay very quickly that made the root unsalvageable. Thus necessitating an extraction. And that resulted in the particular brand of hell known as dry socket, pain that my oral surgeon said is on par with kidney stones and child birth. I've only had of the two of those and I must agree. It is mind-numbing-want-to-kill-yourself agoney! And of course she said mine was one of the worst she'd ever seen. Nice... It is basically exposed nerve and bone marrow. I will never use the term "getting on my damn nerves" so casually ever again.
But! I was able to eat something besides soup and apple sauce just in time for my birthday! The night before I was taken to a fabulous birthday dinner by my dear friend Michaelle and her significant other.I took a chance and ordered the fillet and it was tender as a Mother's love! What a wonderful Christmas Eve!
(I do not know what the fuck I'd have done without Michaelle throughout that month long experience in a scene from Hellraiser. I now refer to her affectionately as "my wife". Also eternal gratitude to Willow, Xan, Vernon, Richard, Jay and Levi, Michael, my oral surgeon and her staff of angels, my neighbors, and the recreational drug users who saved my life by contributing to the cause in my time if need before I could be seen by the endodontist and oral surgeon and get my Rx. Do I agree with recreational drug use? Hell no. Am I grateful I know folks who do? Hell yes.)
Another wonderful and amazing thing has been working with the unbelievable TarotDame, Kiki! OMG she has been amazing! I am forever grateful to the life changing skills she is teaching me through our personal coaching sessions! If you want to learn how to manifest the life you are meant to live, don't delay any longer! She is so nurturing, compassionate, and her teaching tools GET RESULTS! And she has the patience of St. Jude! I am so very Lucky to have her! *big smile*
1. First card- Use your Ascendant to explain what you already know
2. Second card - Use your Moon sign to explain what is challenging you
3. Third card - What is being created in general
1. Queen of Cups - My ascendant sign is Aquarius. So the face I show to the world or how people see me as is outgoing, very likeable, a weirdo, eccentric, and a person who sees all of humanity as equals and believes it's my duty too be a humanitarian. As Michaelle would say, I "see the spark of God in even the worst of us". So with this QofC it seems that this month I will be even more nurturing and loving to the masses. The stork on this version also shows the fact that I've been having those crazy baby notions again. At 41! WTF. (and I got some pretty crazy signs today that flipped my wig man! A child came into the shop where i work who was a carbon copy of the child I'd had a dream about a week ago! Oh, and her mom's name was Dreama! Come on now, could I make that shit up?!) Aquarians are also planners and know-it-alls. Funny thing is, they usually do know it all lol. They also come across as fearless and are folks who take action and cut through bullshit. They don't talk about it, they be about it. So I perhaps the person that people will also see is the Me who Kiki is trying so hard to give the skills to take action and get shit done and how sincere I am. I also notice how at peace this queen is. This also has to do with me working with the Lwa LaSirene so much.
2. 3 of swords - My moon sign is a funny one. It's basically on the cusp of Pisces and Aries. Nice huh? So I'm either non confrontational but wish I'd just deal with shit head on, or I nut the fuck up and feel bad that I hurt the other persons feelings lol. I am proud to say I've gotten so much better with this. So what is challenging me emotionally is being kinda sad because I don't have a partner (Really y'all, what word does one use at my age? I mean, boyfriend just sounds ridiculous as shit after 25!) The 3ofSw almost always shows up as infidelity when I do readings. But since I am not with anyone, I'd say it has to do with direct and less than pleasant communication and clearing the air (swords) with the person I was dating for a couple of months. The one who didn't my birthday. He didn't forget. He just didn't do it. He "didn't get any gifts this year for anyone else either." So you want me to be your girlfriend (and he truly did!) but I'm no more important than "anyone" else?! Dude, did you fall and hit your head or are you huffing paint? Do NOT play with me about my Christmas birthday! But not a card, a cupcake, a flower from somebody's yard? I almost never drink, but I do so love St. Germain/soda with lime. Not even a birthday drink from him. BECAUSE YES, I BOUGHT THAT MYSELF WHEN WE WENT OUT! After my friend and her man took me for fine dining. Needless to say,that was the last straw.
I think I need to explore the fact that I left my ex back in 2004 when he broke up with me on my birthday. Until this clown, I'd never broken up with anyone. So this was a huge step for me to take a stand and put my own needs, feelings and worth above someone else's. I'm so glad I finally started to wake up, to take a stand. To not tolerate bullshit because of my bleeding heart and allowing sympathy and/or empathy for other's issues to prevent me from setting boudaries and demand that they are respected. So I guess this card is telling me I need to speak my peace honestly but without going batshit crazy on the other person. Clear, direct communication when my heart has been hurt.
3. High Priestess - God I love tarot lol. Y'all know this is my all time favorite card in tarot! What I'm creating in general is the woman I most admire and strive to be. A woman who is poised and graceful when appropriate yet a force to be reckoned with. A woman that others are drawn to because of my depth and wisdom I've gained through learning from my experiences. A confident, gifted tarot reader who allows Spirit to flow through me via my intuition. I notice how both of these regal ladies who have mastered the art of being comfortable in their own skin have far more important things to focus on than this triad of confusion, suffering and sorrow. One is focused in peaceful mediation (dear Jesus, Isis, and Freyja Kiki, OK, OK lady LMAO). The other is focused on self-reflection. Both are focused on how to be of service to others. This is also the card I associate LaSirene with more than any other. I am we'll and truly blessed. My card for the year is The Wheel is saying that January will start 2013 rolllin' along quite nicely!
You don't know how to start Just look inside your heart You know I feel confused I don't know what to choose
You better take a stand And find out who you are You better make a plan 'Cause this has gone too far
When we went to the wishing well, We thought we saw the light
(If you) Start, start, start to wake up, Scream, scream, scream all you want See, see, see what you've done Start, start, start to wake up
I don't know what to do To make it right for you You tell me I'm no good I feel misunderstood I'm sick of taking blame Playing the same old game
When we went to the wishing well, We thought we saw the light But even though we took that trip, It never came out right
If you Start, start, start to wake up Scream, scream, scream all you want See, see, see what you've done Start, start, start to wake up
Now you
Start, start, start to wake up Scream, scream, scream all you want See, see, see what you've done Start, start, start to wake up Start, start, start to wake up Scream, scream, scream all you want See, see, see what you've done
Start, start, start to wake up Start, start, start to wake up Scream, scream, scream all you want See, see, see what you've done Start, start...
I'd like to start off by saying thank you to all of you for reading this blog. When I first created it, it was designed to be a journal, a means of catharsis. I wasn't sure if I was going to make it public. I'm glad I did and I want you to know that it really warms my heart when I look and see all of the places you all check in from. Life is a busy, crazy thing and I thank you for taking time out of yours to come visit with me here.
Because I am reading tarot professionally, I have started another blog, Creole Moon Tarot. I'm still working out what the format/content will be but it will not be the personal tales of Krysten like Violette Kitty is. As soon as you see it you will notice the stark contrast.
So I invite you to come visit the other blog and leave feedback. And I thank you all.
I decided to try Lisa's Owning Your Own Epic Greatness spread. Elementally I see I am odds with myself because fear (cups) extinguishes my enthusiasm (wands). I'm not grounded enough in the mundane world of logic and cutting the bullshit (one earth, no air)
1. My greatest fear about owning my own epic greatness? - Rx 10 of wands - my greatest fear is how to break out of the prison of fear. This also shows my fear of hurting my back again. Also the fear of having to assume responsibility and getting overwhelmed.
2. Challenge to overcome this fear- My glorious Rx High Priestess II- I have to push past the boundary of indecision, that constant nagging fear of "getting it wrong". I need to trust myelf more and see myself as the powerful woman that so any others see me as. So many people are drawn to me, tell me their deepest, darkest most sacred secrets. Things that could change or even ruin life as they know it.
3. Let go - The World XXI - At first this threw me for a loop, but I realize it is the negative people or situations that are around me at times. If we are all mirrors reflecting the people in our lives, then that means those negative aspects that are within me. My being stubborn and ridged in my approach. My being focused on what why things will go wrong and not why they will go right. My ego and its many bruises. Not believing on magick, especially my own. And not celebrating my accomplishments. Anyone who mirrors this I need to remove from m orbit. Even if they are really good people that I care about.
4. New channel of support - Rx Princess of Cups - Waiting, ever so patiently, with so much kindness and love are brings in both the mundane and the esoteric realm. They are committed to supporting me in any creative, intuitive, or emotional means of expression. And to learning to have consistent inner peace, regardless of what is going on around me.
5. Leadership responsibility - Ace of Wands - Wowww. A whole new way of living and leading others from the darkness of fears similar to my own. Spiritual liberation born from creating hope.
I need to marinate on the depth of this...
But I can say that I have taken steps toward all of this in the past week. Lets see
I just traipsed home after spending time in my favorite den of debauchery. I decided to take a nice hot shower to unwind. For some reason Amy Winehouse came to mind, and then I remembered that she is a Virgo so her birthday must have just passed or be coming up soon. So after slipping on my jamas I Google to find out when her birthday is. It is today! September 14th. Now I haven't listened to Amy in forever, so I have no idea why it was made clear to me that today is her birthday. Nor why it is important for me to make a post about it since I haven't made any posts on here since July. But it is, and so I am. I was also called to use my Dark Angels tarot. Perhaps because Amy is a beautiful dark angel.
I have chosen to select the Ace of Cups. I pray that Amy has transitioned to a beautiful new state of being that is filled with peace, contentment and love. That she realizes how deeply she touched so many hearts, and that she is missed both body and soul. RIP sweet Amy. Since either iPad sux or I'm just not tech savy, I am not able to post the video I want to, so here is the link to a beautiful duet she performed with Tony Bennett as well as a link to the post I made last year when she passed.
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