What I Want/What I Need - Day 19

I like to use more than one deck sometimes. Tonight I'm using The Universal Goddess and the Robin Wood.

What I want - Rx King of Cups - The Hindu Goddess Sariswati, the goddess of creativity, the arts, knowledge and memory. There is a river in India named after her so she is associated with rivers. (Maybe I need to go down by the Mississippi and connect with her like I often do with the Orisha Oshun) Being reversed, this shows that I want to be able to express and enjoy all of these qualities. And being the Rx KofC it shows I feel very unsuccessful in these areas as well as emotional fulfillment. It's like that waterfall is so much blocked emotion and joy. The small base of land feels like isolation. I do want to get out more and do more enjoyable things like go to movies, the ballet, listen to live bands and do some creative works like knitting, candle and soap making and anything involving Mod Podge and glitter lol.

What I need - Rx Temperance XIV - the Persian (Iranian) goddess Anahita who is a fertility goddess and also associated with the divinity of water. The first thing I notice is the peacock displaying his plumes proudly behind her. I think maybe Oshun is trying to get my attention as this is one of her sacred creatures. And now I see the seashells, which are a symbol of Yemaya, Oshun's sister. I've done spell work to both of them lately and am still waiting for those prayers to be answered. Since Temperance is all about healing, patience and the delicate integration of opposing elements this is saying I need to be patient (*Rant - ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?! Omg if i am any more patient I'll did an plastic admit bracelet with my name and birthday! -- end rant*) because the two of them are working to create the healthiest and most stable of results in answer to my prayers. I now see the calm, confident, patient look on her face.

 

How can I get what I want? - The Hermit Rx - I guess I need to get out more, be more social. I've been a bit secluded. With a birthday a few weeks away, I am feeling old and unaccomplished. I don't really want this, but I feel like given that I drew this card as an answer to the Rx KofC it means I need to go on a date. Maybe an opportunity to do so will present itself and I suppose I am being guided to get off the ice mountain and socialize. Hmm...

How to get what I need - Rx Page of Swords - Really. Another Rx card. I guess I need to stop trying to speaking about how messed up shit is and how long is taking for it to turn around. Positive affirmations, perhaps even righting them again. As Abraham-Hicks says, don't keep talking about what is if what is is not the way you want it to be. Talk about the way I want it to be as though it is the way it is.

 

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