Summer Solstice 2014 - Joy

Aaannndd...

We're back! Damn, when I fall off, I fall OFF!!! Six months to the day! Anyway, let's just get to the point. If you don't follow the girls who do the Tarot Blog Hop, you may want to check it out. I haven't participated in a long time, but I still support them. They do posts based on the Celtic Wheel of the Year. Today is Litha or Midsummer, the longest day of the year when the sun shines the longest it will the entire year. The topic for the hop was "How can I bring more joy into my life?" It's so weird to have the words joy and tarot in the same sentence and not have Arwen saying it lol!

This is a damn good question since I just found out 3 days ago that the "safe, responsible, reliable" neighbor I left my beloved 1 1/2 year old Belgian Shepherd Selene with wasn't such a good choice. I've been gone two weeks. She's dead. I have no words to explain what I feel. Before I start throwing things and crying uncontrollably, I'll leave that topic alone.

So here's shag tarot has to say about how I can find some joy. Although I kinda feel like saying fuck joy and anything to do with it. *sigh*

 

1. Where can I find joy? - Queen of Cups - By the sea. I'm currently in the UK, close to the coast, and have already been to the water and will spend a week there soon. What's funny is I haven't used this deck in over two years and it is one of the ones I brought with me from he US. And it is the one I brought when I wentt to the beach a few weeks ago. And guess which card I took pictures of lol. I felt so much LaSirene energy and I have heard her gently whisper in my ear today. And here she is. I also feel like this her reminding me of how much joy music brings me, but as I look at the fish, that she wants me to dance. I stopped my morning therapy of listening and dancing to Pharelle's "Happy" at least three times first thing in the morning. Need to get back to that This is also a reminded to meditate.

2. What will help me to find joy? - Page of Swords- As I was shuffling I hear "the anise is by writing/blogging" and here we have a true representation of communication and done in a very raw, speak with no filter kind of a way. And that is the whole point of this blog. I created it as a place where I can speak from a place that is unfiltered and raw. That's why I do nothing at all to promote it. I don't want to be concerned about what I say or who it will affect. It's my haven to say what the fuck I want of need to. It's how I cleaf my head. Very swords-like indeed.

As I look at this boy offering me two swords presented on a beautiful cobalt cushion, one silver the other gold, I'm reminded that happiness IS a choice. Is a difficult one as of late, but I know what happens if I choice not to actively pursue it. It ain't pretty.

3. What will hold me back from it? - Strenght VIII - Ha, this was the very last card that I drew when shit just got ridiculously crazy and I stopped posting. I'll need to go back and see what it had to say back then.

This card has so much solar energy to it, it's Leo. Not recognizing just how strong I am, how much shit I've dealt with and overcome and not giving mySelf credit for diminishes my power. I need to channel Leo energy that radiates pride, confidence. Think Mick Jagger, Lucille Ball and President Obama and his pimp-ass walk. Stop thinking small, embrace feminine, feline power like on the card.

As I'm typing this I guess I got confirmation as sun-colored feline jumped on the cards lol. Meet Ozzy who is a love! Cats. No shame lol!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Courage to Embrace Love - Day 67

Tonight I've pulled the Strength VIII card. This card for me is about inner strength,fortitude. The first thing my eye is drawn tied the red roses beside the woman's arm. What I getting from this is having the strength to embrace or be open to love or romance. I see how both the woman's and the lion's eyes are closed. This speaks of the trust and courage it takes from both parties to allow one's self to be vulnerable. Being ruled by Leo it also speaks to having a strong sense of self worth and a commanding precense that exudes power, but personal power over insecurity not power or control over others. It's about having the strength to face the scarier aspects of ourselves and embrace the lovingly.

 

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The Chariot and Stomach Pain - Day 66

The Chariot VII card is ruled by the sign Cancer. Cancer rules the breast/chest and stomach. I've intentionally chosen this card because my tummy is very unhappy, in addition to I just got out of the car after 9 hours in one. I'm going to bed now.

 

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Vampire Road trip to Nashville - Day 65

So I spent the night in a car driving from New Orleans to Nashville for their first vampire tour. My brother and his wonderful girlfriend are big in that subculture, so I care be supportive. so this is the post that should have gone out last night. I figured The Chariot from the Gothic Tarot would be appropriate as an intentional draw. Set your course in life and choose the best possible means to get there. If you don't like it, you can always go back lol.

Moms, Dogs, and African Violets - Day 64

Tonight I''ve drawn The Empress. It's interesting how the card was done almost exclusively in shades of green and  slight tinges of blue. We see a mother out in the garden pausing from her work to tend to her child's skinned knee. She has on a bandana that makes think of the Blessed Mother's crown of stars . In her flower bed is a box of garden tools, a watering can, what appears to be a dog dish or water bowl, & a potted African violet. Given the Empress card's association with maternal energy, this makes me think of a very nice conversation I had with my mother last night. Another wonderful thing is the stars on her head and the African violet  lets me know that one of my most beloved spirits is back in touch with me. I cannot explain the gratitude enjoy that makes me feel. And the dog dish? Well I guess that's because I've foolishly somehow become somebody's mama by default! You know I need to have my head examined! That she is precious and I love her already. Good grief! I'm such a sucker lol.

Self-care Through Solitude - Day 63

I felt called to use the Incedental Tarot tonight and came up with the 9 of Oaks (pentacles). We see a mighty oak tree with a large, strong trunk that seems firmly rooted and numerous branches with a broad canopy. The tree is encircled by a wreath of oak leaves and 9 acorns. This card for me usually means independence and being comfortable in one's own skin. However, tonight it just feels like the powerful need for the elusive blessing of solitude in order to feel grounded as well as the need to be able to self support. That comes from the master 9 from the major arcana, The Hermit IX. It also draws on feelings of self-doubt and anger which cause me to withdraw and put up barriers. I totally get it since this is how I'm feeling a lot these days. Today I found out someone I care for very deeply is moving away. Though this will be such a good thing for him and that brings me enormous joy because he is such a beautiful soul, I felt a kind of sadness and loss that really kinda took me by surprise and went very deep. I didn't realize how much he means to me until I read the words saying he is moving. *sarcastic laugh* Ain't that always the way. But he and I are both too wounded to pursue the feelings that I now see are there. He's got PTSD from Iraq (though Veterans in general have a massive place in my heart, been down that road before!) and I've got the craziness that is my life right now so that'd just be some toxic bullshit. And I do recognize my tears where also reflecting pain from other relationships and friendships that have ended for one reason or other. When I said something to him today that reflected the afore mentioned kind of skewed self image, he text me the most beautiful picture. I made it my phone's screen saver. I need to be reminded of this message.

 

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Keep Tryin' - Day 62

Tonight's draw is from The Ancestral Path deck. It is the second deck I ever owned and was given to me by my dear friend Glenda who taught me how to read cards when I lived in Ft. Lauderdale years ago. While shuffling, The Star XVII fell out. This card has such a peaceful feel to it. There is a Native woman pouring water from two vessels, one onto river stones, one back into the source. I'm now hearing the words of Abraham-Hicks "co-creating with source". I get a strong message of healing, which I so desperately need. The pain I've been in this past week has been so bad because of the temperature and barometric pressure changes. Muscular, bone, discs, and nerve pain from Hell! The glistening starlight is telling me I need to go back to accupunture. I think I'll do a few bullet points.

* go to accupunture

* spending time with my brother whom I love so much (he is Native) and his awesome girlfriend this coming weekend will be a really good thing

* listen/watch Abraham-Hicks YouTube videos daily

* go down to the Mississippi and give an offering

* keeping looking up and forward. Blessings are just beyond the clouds, and closer than they may seem. I have gotten this card 3 or 4 times since I started this daily posting challenge

* sign up to do extra work for all the filming they do in town

Here is the song I instantly heard when it fell out:

 

 

 

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